How to build emotional resilience.

I was on a hike with a friend yesterday.

She was telling me about a choice she had made that was right for her… she had quit her high paying job. Her husband, on the other hand, was spiraling out under the stress of being the sole provider for the family.

Please know that they are financially secure.

Like all of us, it’s not the circumstances causing the pain, it’s what they are thinking about the situation that is causing the cosmic tear/drama in their world.

She asked, so I told her what I honestly think.

This turmoil is a gift.

There is no real danger. They could both retire right now and be fine if they live another 50 years.

But the circumstances are bringing up their shit.

And that is gold for personal growth.

If things had been stressful and they muddled through, there’s no personal growth in that.

But because it was hitting some old, sensitive beliefs, it was pulling them up short and demanding examination.

This is a golden opportunity to excavate those old patterns and decide if a new paradigm will serve them better.

Maybe he is thinking that he’s not a man if he isn’t able to make as much money as she did.

Maybe he is thinking that she doesn’t love him if she isn’t hustling at work.

It could be a thousand different beliefs that are causing him panic.

Figuring it out now, when they won’t end up in a food line, is a gift I hope they take advantage of.

If they do the work now, they will be emotionally resilient when a situation with big consequences actually happens.