As my mother says, \u201cAll change is bad.\u201d
\nI understand.
\nBecause often it feels bad to make a change.<\/p>\n
When friends and family sense change, they act out.
\nThey lash out verbally.
\nAt the ones they love.<\/p>\n
\u201cALL my friends are going to the beach on Spring Break.\u201d
\n\u201cWe are the only kids we know who have never been to Disney World, Mother.\u201d
\nI didn\u2019t know that entire sentences could be said with clenched teeth. It\u2019s really like a ventriloquist act.<\/p>\n
And the reason they say these mean things is sometimes it gets results.
\nYep.
\nIt\u2019s not premeditated.
\nBut we are all trained to do what brings results.
\nIt\u2019s a reflex like when your hands reach out to brace you as you fall.
\nCHANGE. Gaackh! No! Red alert, red alert!
\nThat\u2019s normal. It\u2019s how we\u2019re wired.<\/p>\n
But now, the pivotal moment is upon you\u2026 you<\/em> get to choose how to respond.<\/p>\n 1 \u2013 You could give a snappy, snarky response like, \u201cI\u2019m sure you aren\u2019t the only person who has never been to Disney World.\u201d The correct answer? Well, really, any of the three. I\u2019ve given them all. The grousing is the process of change. Do nothing. It\u2019s not about you. And if you are the one going through the change, well, throw your tiny little tantrum, and feel that feeling. As my mother says, \u201cAll change is bad.\u201d I understand. Because often it feels bad to make a change. When friends and family sense change, they act out. They lash out verbally. At the ones they love. \u201cALL my friends are going to the beach on Spring Break.\u201d \u201cWe are the only kids we, Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1427,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[62,64],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1425","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-all","category-ideas-to-consider"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/trantrum-2av600x400a.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3c0Qo-mZ","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1425","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1425"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1425\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2293,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1425\/revisions\/2293"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/1427"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1425"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1425"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ellenyale.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1425"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n2 \u2013 Picture yourself as Mother Earth, saying, \u201cGee\u2026 you\u2019re the only one? That must really suck.\u201d
\n3 \u2013 You are merely an observer to the way change is worn by your loved one, and say, \u201cMmmm\u201d in a neutral yet compassionate way.<\/p>\n
\n#2 would be what society would suggest I do as the \u201cperfect mother\u201d(except maybe the word suck), but #3 will bring you the most real peace.<\/p>\n
\nInstead of running away from the icky feeling, just know that it\u2019s supposed to happen.
\nInstead of trying to fix things for people, know that it is part of the process they need to go through.<\/p>\n
\nDon’t try to fix things.
\nBut let them know you are compassionately listening.<\/p>\n
\nEven though they say it is.<\/p>\n
\nThat’s change, baby.
\nYou know you’re alive.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"