Hi, I’m Ellen. I am a Master Life Coach. I help teens get emotionally ready for college. But what I really do is have deep conversations with really cool people who are ready to create a life they love.
What are you thinking? How irresponsible? How typical of a teen? Sounds like me?
We were at SouthPark Mall a couple of days ago, and we had separated in order to get the most done in the least amount of time. And true, I didn’t want to hear about how cute her candle that smelled like a cupcake is, nor did I want to hear about how rose-gold must be perfect because it’s the combination of rose and gold, two of her favorite things.
I love her, but it had been a long day. Fifteen is a wonderful age of innocence edged with reality. I was feeling 54.
About 45 minutes in, I get a call. Unknown number. It’s my daughter. She has lost her phone at Victoria’s Secret. More specifically, she lost her Delia’s bag and she had put her phone in the bag. It was gone.
I head to Victoria’s Secret. She and the kind folks who work at Victoria’s Secret had scoured the place. But I had learned from the man who helped me find my lost car at the airport last month (ha!) that you start by retracing your steps. So we did.
Forty-five minutes later, I too agreed that it was no longer in the store. We knew she had it when she entered the store. We decided to go to Delia’s to see if anyone had turned it in there.
On the way to Delia’s, the bright spot of my day was when a little girl was pretending to be a mannequin in the window of The Limited store. She looked incredibly adorable, and familiar. I popped my head in the store, and yes, she was the daughter of friends of mine. But no time to chat, I told them I was on the hunt for my daughter’s lost phone and carried on.
For all you problem solvers out there, let me just say that we took care of the loose ends. There was a reason the phone was in the bag, we did contact mall security, etc.
The last thing I did was text her phone. Although it was locked, you could still see text messages if you found it. I texted asking the finder to call my number, please!!!
At this point was where the magic happened. My daughter had been the perfect balance of mortified and calm. She had handled everything with cool confidence. She had gotten help. She notified authorities. She had searched thoroughly, had not fallen apart, and stayed kind through the whole thing.
What a gift. To know she could handle crisis, and come up with a plan. Then come up with a plan for going two months without a phone. She looked and found the bright side. Even if we never find the phone, it’s one of those life lessons that showed me how she shines.
We were two blocks from home when my daughter answered my cell. Someone had found her phone. She made the arrangements to meet them at a closed Bruegger’s Bagels store. Hmmm. I called my husband to let him know where we were meeting strangers, just in case.
After 15 minutes in the cool night air, who pulls up in the dark blue van we were waiting for?
My friends I saw in the mall.
Magic or incredible coincidence?
Let me stress that this is a big mall.
Someone left the bag on the hood of my friends’ van. Everything was still in the bag… the phone, the Delia’s purchase, coupons. Everything.
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Then magic happened for the third time that night. My daughter reached into her wallet and gave their little girl the Bruegger’s Bagel gift card I had given her for Christmas.
Happy Mom sigh.
I love when challenging things happen, because that’s when the magic occurs. We have a chance to see what bubbles up so we can examine it.
And I don’t mean my daughter’s dealing with it. I am talking about your thoughts when you read the headline that a teenager had lost a cell phone. What was your thought? What were your thoughts as the story played out? And what do those thoughts mean to you?
Your turn to make magic.
Let’s talk about money.
Originally, humans traded things. Furs for gunpowder. Childcare for food. But it was unwieldy to carry around a live chicken to get a doctor’s care. So money is just a way to trade that fits in your pocket. Or your Gucci bag.
In our current cyber age, we don’t even have to carry currency with us to trade. My computer talks to the bank’s computer, and numbers are moved around. Money is a bit like Peter Pan. Money is now a figment of our imagination as long as we all continue to choose to believe.
But, since money doesn’t even have to be tangible, why is money still such a big issue?
The problem has never been about the money. Money is energy. It’s about how the energy is flowing in your life. If you are putting a lot of energy into starting a new business, and you are nervous about supporting your family, the energy will be tentative and unsure. If you have a lot more money than your friends, you may try to hide it, and exude energy of apology and guilt.
It’s always the thoughts behind the money issues that are the problem.
In turn, if the energy in your life is confident and joyful, people want to be on your team, and they bring their energy with them. Energy multiplies.
So here’s the skinny –
Find the areas where you have true convictions. Check in with your body. Your body will know when you feel the right energy. It will be calm and motivated, strong and peaceful. Put your time and the things you value towards these ends. It might be world peace and it might be collecting Pez dispensers. No judging. Your body will know.
Take a look at your timid or tentative energy areas. Ask yourself why you are unsure. Take a look at those thoughts. Hold them up to the light and see if those thoughts are still true for you. See if you can find a thought that is just as true, but that works better for you. A thought that makes you feel like you are being released from a promise you wish you hadn’t made.
Choose a thought that makes you excited to take the next step, even if that step is only sitting peacefully. As you lean towards the new thoughts that work for you, energy will shift your way.
Money is energy. Pick a thought: one that you truly believe. One that makes you all tingly. And you will turn on your money magnet.
I think my sidewalk is trying to tell me something.
I walk down my front stairs, take a right, and there, on the sidewalk are the words. Pain Stops Here. I don’t know if it is paint or acid or something a dog shared, but how perfect for a Life Coach.
Some life coaches write action plans for top-level executives. Some Life Coaches help people who have lost a loved one.
But at the end of the day we all are really trying to do the same thing.
Stop the pain.
I’m on board, but when my front steps say, “Call Your Mother” I am going to officially freak out.